KINGS & QUEENS Have Boundaries

They say, don't take but give.

I'd like to offer a clear and focused point of view from the subject of BOUNDARIES.

I do agree to give, give, give... But, what happens when someone you know constantly takes from you even when you don't have anything to give? In the most extreme case, it would be rape. To steal what you have not allowed for them to have.

Now on a lesser violent scale besides rape, what if someone takes away your energy by popping up every day at the same time when you specifically told them not to? But still, they disregard your wishes and show up anyway expecting you to open the door after you've explained to them earlier that you're tired and need your rest. "Oh don't be such an old fart," they say teasingly. But they don't just do this once, but constantly. And then laugh it off when you kindly explain to them why you need to be asleep.

BOUNDARIES...

There are many different levels of people stepping over your boundaries. From the most extreme cases of rape and violence, to the more silent killers which come in the form of MANIPULATION.

Manipulation is hard to prove because there are no physical bruises and/or pictures to take and prove that you have been violated or disrespected. When a person manipulates you, they always start by being sweet and nice, often times showering you with tons of compliments to make you feel "special". In this sense, now they've won your favor.

But because of that, now they think you OWE them something.

Thus, they will step over your boundaries as far as disregarding what is important to you.

ALWAYS KEEP THIS IN MIND: IF YOU DON'T STAND FOR SOMETHING, THEN YOU WILL FALL FOR ANYTHING.

And sometimes, people will fall for just about anything because it's better than being alone. So they'll fall under the spell of manipulation because at least they have a friend, a lover or a relative to be around. They'll excuse that person's ill or toxic behavior and say, "Well that's just the way they are."

But what about you? Who are you? And what do you stand for? What are you willing to accept and not accept?

Creating boundaries means having "self-love" and that is extremely important.

The nicest person on earth who buys you gifts, throws you birthday parties and showers you with compliments "all day - every day" can step over your boundaries if you don't stop them in their tracks because they think they have an upper hand. They think because they've done a number of good deeds for you that now they can have you wrapped around their finger and you'll drop whatever you're doing in a heartbeat when they snap their fingers. But the only person in control of your life is YOU.

Life is about choices.

And at the end of the day, you make your own choices and no one else can or should make them for you. (Unless you are self-destructive and someone cares enough to step in and take you out of your funk)

So if someone constantly oversteps your boundaries and belittles your wishes and concerns but you continue to allow it, then you have no one to blame but yourself because you have the power to walk away from them or shut them out. Yes, it's a clean-cut and simple decision. Either people will empower you or they will zap away your energy. What company do you want to keep?

But I am no heartless person. I know how difficult it can be to walk away from a person you love. Walking away from a husband or a wife, a mother or a father or a best friend is not that easy to do when you care deeply. You're always hoping for a solution and a win/win situation. You probably also hope to heal and overcome any obstacles that your relationship might encounter.

However, what I am suggesting is that life is about choices. And you can choose to allow someone else to keep taking, taking and taking away your dignity, or you can stop it by setting boundaries and protecting your own dignity AND integrity.

Remember that the light of love is not foggy or muddy, nor is it confused or fearful.

The light of love is crystal clear, wise, compassionate, confident and brave. Love does not fear rejection. Love does not seek approval. Love does not fear being alone because love is abundant and does not need to take.

So do not allow people to take from you what is not theirs to take. In other words, steal from you. Be it time, money, your physical body, emotional well-being or energy, etc.

Think of it this way. There are certain things you would probably not say to a King or Queen because you are in the presence of royalty, but in the presence of the common everyday man, you might be more loose with your words. But what I am suggesting is that we are all Kings and Queens, and the same respect that you would give to a person in a position of power is the same respect that we should all give to each other because we are all powerful entities. (Are we not all made in the image and likeness of God?) Yet unfortunately there are people who do not act as Kings and Queens because they have low self esteems. Perhaps someone beat down their self-worth when they were growing up with constant criticism along with other ill treatment. And now as an adult, they do not see or believe in their own potential so they want to strip away yours since they learned that behavior from someone else. If this is the case, it's unfortunate that the person is in pain but your guilt should not allow for you to stick around and continue to be their scapegoat or crutch. And although you might realize that their negative behavior may not be intentional, it doesn't excuse them to continue it because it's what they know. (They treat you the way they treat themselves) The point is for YOU to recognize it and know that just because someone else has a low self esteem does not mean that you should have a low self esteem too. And just because someone else does not prioritize their life with great value and respect, does not mean that you shouldn't either. Teach them something new by being an example of a healthy person who has boundaries and deserves to be respected.

So if you're on a different page as someone else but they desperately attempt for you to let them in when you continuously tell them that the answer is "NO," don't be afraid to let them go. (They should respect your answer, the same way you respect theirs.) Remember, we are all Kings and Queens including YOU! The difference is that some people are aware of their "self-worth" while others aren't. Some people are blossoming while others are closed up tightly, and so they might envy your vibrant outlook on life while belittling what's important to you, talking down to you, wanting to hang out late when you need your sleep, demanding more of your time so you miss out on other opportunities, degrading your accomplishments, embarrassing you in front of others, or expecting you to drop any and everything because they think that you should put their needs in front of your own.

That whole, if you can't beat 'em just join 'em thing - Well I say, I'd take being alone at the top (drama-free) over being miserable at the bottom. Patience is a virtue and eventually you'll attract high energy, clear and focused individuals like yourself even if it isn't many. Quality is better than quantity.

So do not allow anyone to pull you down, to try and convince you of their ways or brainwash you. Beware of manipulation - the silent killer with a sweet smile.

Do not stoop down to someone else's level to join them in what they call "quality time" if it means being at an "eye to eye" level with people who gossip, abuse drugs and toxins and/or live a self-destructive lifestyle.

Instead, create boundaries and have them rise up to your level if they so willingly choose too or just make a strong choice to disassociate with them all together. It's better to be a person of great influence, than a person who gets pulled into an unhealthy social web.

I'll leave it with one more example.

Jesus himself lost his temper and lashed out a wip when people disrespected a temple to do business deals in when he wanted to keep it as a sacred and holy space.

You see, what Jesus did was he created a boundary by showing that his temple was to be kept in a "certain way," and when people overstepped his boundaries, he got angry - because he would not allow for them to just have THEIR way.

IF YOU DON'T STAND FOR SOMETHING, THEN YOU WILL FALL FOR ANYTHING.

Most leaders of light walk alone. (Actually, we are all leaders if we remember that our free will is a gift that gives us the power to choose) Many of them dared to speak and live the truth although there were consequences to face, but because of their brave heart they pressed on...

Do not give in to pressures from society or manipulation from your peers, even if their constant praise makes you feel good or because you want and need to be accepted by family and friends. And if you do happen to lose friends because they don't respect your boundaries, than it's better to be alone for a while until you attract people who do respect your boundaries, and altogether you as a person. Remember, you are not a doormat. No one has the right to walk all over you so don't allow it. Put your foot down.

Set boundaries for yourself, and love yourself enough that if someone (or many people) overstep your boundaries, you can have the wisdom to discern right from wrong, and continue on your path by yourself if need be.

Have clarity and peace of mind.

If others do not have that and want to bring you down with them, just remember, that misery loves company.

So be strong, be bright and fly away freely.

Don't let anyone clip your wings, even if they do it unintentionally. Only you know what is best for you. And if you do let someone (or a group of people) clip your wings because you feel "guilty" about parting ways, you will regret it later on and begin to blame them for following them instead of being your own leader.

Believe in yourself. Create your own life. Where there is no door, CREATE A DOOR. Know your divine inner power and do NOT give it away to people who do not deserve it! Like I said before, although we are all Kings and Queens, some people are not aware of their divinity and so they might project "their" negative emotions onto you, which means, they do not deserve your time and energy until they are ready to interact in a "healthy" relationship.

And don't let anyone make you feel like you owe them something, and like you can't get up and leave if you want to.

We are not slaves nor prisoners to one another.

You are free to choose right from wrong, and to choose love or fear.

The greatest love of all is when you love yourself.

So do that, love yourself - and you will attract more loving individuals who love themselves as well.

Create the life you want to live.

Believe that you deserve the best.

And protect your god-given spirit with self-loving boundaries.

And remember, you do not own anyone, nor does anyone own you.

Be free from bondage.

Allow seasons to change and never fear moving on with life.

BLESSINGS & PROSPERITY: MAY YOU FLY HIGH WITH OTHER BRINGERS OF LIGHT.

SEEK AND YE SHALL FIND - SEARCH WITHIN.